Upon receiving the new CHESS LIFE with the cow on the cover, my friend and USCF life member said, “That’s bizarre.”
As I waited for my student to arrive a young fellow studying to be a doctor walked by the table at Borders, stopping because of the chess set. He saw my World Open tee-shirt and mentioned he had lived in Philadelphia and had once visited the Adams Mark to spectate. He picked-up the copy of New in Chess, then Chess Monthly, before looking at the cow cover of CL. “What’s a cow doing on the cover of Chess Life?”, he asked. He put it down between the other two magazines, saying, “This is like one of those ‘Which one does not fit’ things.”
My students mother, originally from Azerbaijan, thought it “absurd.”
The next day, today, another student said it was “goofy.” We went to lunch near another Borders and he wanted to look at the magazines. We spotted a copy of Chess Life. The way the magazine sat in the rack one could not see the cow. “I don’t think they meant it that way, but it worked out good!”
I have seen every cover of every issue since 1970, and many earlier issues. Without a doubt, this is the worst cover I have ever seen. The cover of a magazine should project the content. One would not, for example, expect to see a cow on the cover of a baseball magazine; or a Bridge magazine; or a Poker magazine.
I do not know who is responsible for this ‘April Fools Joke’, but it is too serious to be funny. What it is, is pitiful.
I suggest the person responsible for this cover listen to the song by Dierks Bentley, What Was I Thinking, repeatedly.
Michael Bacon
I agree.
I disagree. It is absurd. It is goofy. But it’s not boring. If there’s one thing a cover can’t be, it’s boring. The first purpose of the cover is to grab your attention. Maybe one CL cover a year accomplishes that. This one’s got you talking about it. That should tell you something.
I’m reminded of when I used to perform at the Renaissance Faire at Vizcaya in Miami, which no longer exists. Every year, the highlight of the Faire was the “living chess game”, where performers stood on a giant chess board, and would perform (pre-scripted) sword fights for the squares whenever one piece was to capture another. Unlike some Ren Faires, where the chess games are relatively random, with little or no plot to either the show or the chess game, the Miami group always made their chess games top notch. The games were typically miniatures taken from Tartakower and DuMont’s classic “500 Master Games of Chess”, lasting 20 moves or less, with lots of captures, and always ending in checkmate. The performance always had a specific plot line, so it was like a play that just happened to revolve around a chess game.
In our final year at that location, the show was a Renaissance style morality play, centered around a gypsy who made a deal with the Devil, then tried to back out of it when the Devil came to collect. Naturally, they played a chess game, with the gypsy tribe on the white side of the board, and the Devil and his minions on the black side. The back rank of the black side featured the Devil as the king, with the 7 deadly sins as the other pieces (Lust was the queen, Sloth was the queen’s rook who laid down on the a8 and slept for the rest of the show, etc). It was a fun show, with the sins really playing up their individual roles (Envy whining, Greed trying to steal jewelry from the gypsies, etc). In the 6 years I performed at that Faire, I really think that was our best show ever. In the end, the Devil checkmates the gypsy. The moral of the tale is not to make deals with the Devil, because you won’t be able to get out of them.
After the show, the performers always got together immediately for a “post mortem” to discuss what we could do to make the show even better for the next performance. After one performance, the show’s narrator, who was also the captain of the group that year, told us that as he left the stage, he’d been accosted by a nun. Apparently, a group from a Catholic school had come to our show, and the nun had been greatly disturbed that we’d done a performance in front of her kids in which the Devil wins in the end. So our group’s leader told us, “The purpose of art is to illicit an emotional reaction from the audience. We p***ed off a nun. Good job, everybody.”
If the purpose of the cow cover was to get people interested in chess and/or USCF, then I don’t know if it worked. But from the reaction it’s getting on the forums, I’d say that the cover got an emotional response from the people who have seen it, so I’d call it a successful work of art.
Personally, I thought the cover on the rating system was one of the least interesting ones I’ve seen in quite a few years. Say what you will about the cow cover, at least it got people’s attention!
Until now, the cover that drew the most complaints was probably the ‘stacking chess pieces’ one. I was told by staff in New WIndsor that it was the issue that got the fewest requests for free copies to distribute at tournaments.
The scholastic community made a big fuss about the cover with the casino and poker chips on it.
Makes me glad I’m not the Chess Life editor!
This is an awesome story. And while you clearly meant that the purpose of art is to elicit an emotional reaction, the word you used instead is fitting in its way.
Your response could serve as a virtual template to counter any criticism of any cover of any magazine: “It got your attention 'cause you commented on it, therefore it must be good.” In other words, if you criticize something, you confirm its quality or at least, its utility. That should tell you something.
Next time, we could have a cartoon graphically depicting Morphy gutting a moose. That should get even more attention and thus, should be even better. Heh, heh, heh. Or maybe simply an unadorned picture of a tractor, and snag all those hapless readers asking what on earth it means.
An unadorned picture of a tractor would be boring.
Um, it’s not a cow. It’s a bull. See it’s horns? A bull with an udder, with dangling pawns. That’s what’s bizarre about the cover.
And chess players are supposed to be the “smart kids.”
Darrell, you are aware that there are some cattle breeds where the cows have horns, aren’t you?
Uh sorry - no. Horns are not a gender specific trait in cattle. Udders are - as are a set swinging in the back. But not horns.
Polled Herefords do not have horns on either sex.
Many breeds of cattle have horns on both sexes.
And Texans are supposed to “know cattle.”
Obviously not. Sheesh - city kids. 
I totally disagree - it beats pictures of old and/or dead guys that no one except some in chess community know for getting the attention of non-chess folks.
I liked this cover very much. The pawn udders and chessboard design grass were clever and subtle. Images don’t have to have blatantly obvious/“in your face” meanings to be effective.
Yes - this will make me think twice the next time I have an opportunity to grab a hanging pawn.
1-0
I am. I am also aware that horns are typically removed from cows. As your link states.
According to Daniel Lucas, the cover shot was one that was purchased from a stock photo service.
The only editing the USCF did was to add the chess pieces and the chessboard shading to the grass.
Super - but that isn’t what your previous post implied! 
I thought it was reasonably clever and tied to large title on the cover Rural Chess. It’s not like they just stuck a cow on with the small Chess Life logo in the upper left corner. Grabbing attention with a tie in to what is inside is what a magazine cover should do and this one does.